Psychos in Wonderland
by WanderingFlame
Summary: AU 2 psychotic girls are teleported to the YYH demension. What chaos will they cause? Will the gang keep their sanity? Who knows.
1. Humans or Animals?

A/N: ok, this is my new story. My friend Shenron13 helped me write it. Read her stories, they r funny and awsome. so yea...

Disclaimer: We do not own YYH...If we did then Mitarai would belong to Shen and Hiei would belong to me...

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It was a cold, snowy day in Kyoto. Everything was covered in a white sparkly blanket. 

"God it's fucking cold!" The short person rubbed their arms, hoping for some warmth.

"I know Kris." The figure standing next to the first spoke. "Hey, do you know why they call it winter?"

The shorter one looked at their companion. A look of thought came over their face. "Nope, not a clue!" They started walking again.

"Hmmm, maybe it's the name of a rare shell fish."

"Hmmm, you never know Zor." Kris looked around. "Hey look! A forest!" Kris pointed to a...well, forest.

As they were walking they spotted a hole in the ground slightly covered by ferns. Both walked over to it and stared into its dark depths. Zor blinked. "Wow! I don't think I can climb that high!"

Kris tilted his head. "You're right dude. Well, later!" He then jumped into the hole. "YAHOOOOOO!"

Zor sniffed. "I'm alone." He took a step forward and promptly tripped on a tree root and fell into the hole. All the way down he was shouting, "I CAN FLYYYYYYY! I'M A BIRRRRRD!"

**Everyone Else's POV**

"And the next fight is between Yusuke and Chu!" Koto yelled into the mic. "And BEGIN!"

Suddenly they all heard someone screaming, "YAHOOOOOO!" and, "I'M A BIRRRRRD!"

Everyone looked up. Chu and Yusuke suddenly slammed into the ground due to two falling figures falling from the sky and crashing into them.

Everyone was quiet as the two figures rose and dusted themselves off.

The shorter of the two suddenly yelled, "OMG! IT'S RAINING US!"

The taller one screamed, "AHHHH! I DON'T WANNA DIE!" He looked around. "Hey look! We're in Texas!"

The shorter one squinted his eyes as he looked around. "Dude, are you sure? Cuz I see fish!"

The other he looked around the stadium sheilding his eyes with his hand. "You're right! Look at all those ugly fish!" Every demon in the audience glared at him, still too shocked to speak.

The shorter one nodded. "Yeah. We must be in the Specific Ocean."

Koto slowly walked foward. "Um, I think you mean Pacific Ocean. And we're not."

The taller 'boy' glared at her. "No! We mean Spespific Ocean! And yes we are!" They both suddenly froze looking off into space.

Koto tilted her head and poked them both.

**Zor's and Kris's POV**

Kris was poked suddenly. He blinked and looked at the person who poked him. He noticed it was a girl with a fox tail and ears. "AHHHHHHH!"

Next to him Zor screamed, "Noooo! I'm melting! Wait, that's for water. Nevermind."

The person Zor had landed on groaned and got to his feet. "Hey! Who are you guys!"

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A GUY?" Zor shouted and then pulled off 'his' black hat with a jade green dragon on the bill that 'he' was wearing backwards off, revealing mid-back length blonde hair with green streaks.

Everyone stared at him...er, her.

Kris seemed unfazed by all of this. "Ugh! It's sooo fucking damn hot here!" He pulled off his hoodie, being careful of his blood red bandana. "Ah! Much better!"

Everyone looked at Kris.

Yusuke was staring wide eyed. "You're a girl too!"

Kris looked at him with crimson red eyes. She blinked. "Yes, do you have a problem with that!"

Zor blinked. "It's a small world after all." Suddenly they both started singing 'It's a small world after all'. Unfortunately the second shortest boy stopped their melody by bluntly saying, "Who the hell are you?"

Kris looked at him. "OMG! It's that midget from the circus that stuck his finger in a light socket!"

The 'midget' glared at her and reached for his katana.

"Now now Hiei. Let's see who these 'ladies' are." The gelled haired teen that looked like a moron said.

So the taller girl pointed to him and asked, "Who's the idiot?"

A red haired boy, who looked suspiously like a girl, stepped in. "Calm down Hiei, Yusuke! Now who are you young ladies?" He asked politely.

"I'm a lady?" She, the tall one, asked. "Umm...I'm Zorrann Doragon."

Kris looked like she was lost.

The long haired guy turned to her. "And you are?"

Kris blinked. "Who me?" She asked pointing to herself.

The gel head rolled his eyes. "No, the green monkey behind you."

Kris quickly looked over her shoulder. "Where's Cheeze!"

Zor screamed. "Not the hairy Cheeze of Doooom!" She blinked and then saw the people staring at her. "Who are you?" She turned to the orange haired boy. "Why are you so ugly?" That got the gel head laughinng. So she turned to him and asked, "And why are you so stupid?"

Kris was running all around the arena looking for Cheeze. "Cheeze? Cheeze where are you!"

Everyone looked at her strangely.

Zor blinked. "There is no Cheeze." She said looking around. And then she realized there was no Cheeze. "YES! THERE'S NO CHEEZE! THERE'S NO CHEEZE!" she screamed in gel heads ear.

"WILL YOU STOP THAT!" He yelled back.

Zor stopped 'singing' and looked at him. "And you are?"

Kris pointed to the gel head. "QUICK! SOMEONE DROP A BOWLING BALL ON HIS HEAD!"

Gel head glared at her.

She gave him an innocent smile...And then Zor dropped a bowling ball on his head.

Just as he was about to strangle her, she went into a thinking pose. "Well, Toto I don't think we're in Kansas anymore...even though we weren't in Kansas to begin with." She paused. "Where are we? Who are you? Sheesh! I asked that three times. What are you people? Deaf!"

Everyone sweatdropped.

Kris leaned over and whispered to Zor. "No, I think they're veggies!"

The red-head stepped forward. "I'll answer you questions if you step off the ring."

Kris blinked and lifted up each foot one at a time. "You liar! I'm not standing on a ring!"

Everyone sweatdropped...again and the red-head pulled one of those anime falls.

"Uhhh...OK!" Zor said. As she stepped forward she...tripped! And landed flat on her face. So Kris grabbed her by the foot and dragged her off the ring. Everyone else watched with wide eyes.

Finally only Chu, Yusuke, and Koto were left in the ring. Chu and Yusuke started their fight.

Kris sat against the wall, eyes closed.

Red walked over to her. "You never told me who you were."

Kris looked at him. "Names Kris Ōkami. Who are you people and where are we?"

Red gave her a small smie. "I'm Kurama. That's Kuwabara." He pointed to the ugly one with orange hair. "That's Hiei." Points to the 'midget'. "Yusuke is the one fighting who has black hair. And that's the masked fighter." Points to a person who looked like a mummy.

Kris's eyes widened. "A MUMMY! KEWL! Are we in Egypt? Or Kentucky?"

"Or school?" Zor asked, dusting the dust off her clothes.

Kurama blinked. "School?"

"Yep! They kill people." The girl replied.

Kris hissed at the mention of school.

Kuwabara took a few steps away from the girl.

Kris looked at the ring...the fighting ring (the ring is fighting the air!) She pointed to it. "Who's the drunk maniac with the blue ponytail?'

Kurama looked at the man. "That would be Chu."

Both girls developed evil grins. Slowly they snuck up behind Kuwabara and chanted loudly..."CHU! CHU! CHU!" in his ear.

Kuwabara screamed and ran behind Kurama.

Kris started making her way around the arena while immitating a train. "Chu chu chu chu!" she said over and over.

Zor began copying her and soon both were going around the arena.

"What's wrong with you two?" A small boy with yo-yos asked.

Zor stopped her 'chu chuing' to ask, "What's wrong with you?"

Kris continued around the arena acting like a train. She ended up next to Zor...again. "Who are you?"

The yo-yo boy looked at her. "I'm Rinku."

A piece of cloth appeared in Kris's hands and she placed it on her shoulders. "I AM SUPERBAT!"

Zor looked at her. "You mean Super Stupid." She began to laugh so Kris kicked her in the shin. She hopped up and down on one foot holding her shin while chanting 'ow'.

"Quick! Everyone point and laugh!" Kris pointed at Zor and started laughing.

Meanwhile Yusuke had just beat Chu.

The demons in the audience ignored the 2 crazy...insane girls and where yelling and what not.

"Ha" Zor yelled. "No one listened!" She was hopping when a foot 'appeared out of nowhere' and tripped her. "GHOST FOOT!" Zor yelled so loud everyone looked at her. Kris was whistling behind her.

Kuwabara paled. "G-ghost! AHHH!" He hid behind Kurama, who had a sweatdrop.

Kris disappeared and reappeared next to Chu. "Is your name Chu?"

He looked at her strangely but nodded.

Kris's eyes went big. "Are you a train!"

Zor screamed, "A TRAIN!" Then she jumped on him so he was laying flat and she was sitting cross-legged on his back. "ALL ABOARD!" She shouted.

"YAY! Train ride!" Kris joined Zor, by sitting behind her.

Rinku back away by only a few...feet.

Chu blinked. "Get these shellas off me!"

Kris was siging 'The Wheels on the Bus'. "The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round. The wheels on the bus go round and round, all through the town!"

Zor joined her.

Yusuke picked up two pieces of rock from the wall that he crashed into earlier. He threw one at each girl. And...the rocks bounced off each girl's head...and they fell sideways.

"AHHHHHHHHHH! THE MARTAINS ARE ATTACKING! THE MARTIANS ARE ATTACKING!" they both yelled.

Everyone looked at them strangely.

Kris leaned toward Zor and whispered, "Act natural!"

Both girls dropped to all fours and yelled, "MOOOO! MOO! MOOOOOO!"

A demon in the crowd said to his 'friend', "Are they even human?"

"No. They appear to be cows." Came the reply.

Kris heard this (how? no one knows) and jumped to her feet. "I'm not a COW!" She screamed. "I'm a seal!" She clapped her hands together while yelling, "AR AR AR AR!"

"Yeah!" Zor shouted jumping up. "I'm a duck! Meeooowww."

Kurama blinked. "Umm...that's a cat."

"No!" Zor rolled her eyes. "A cat goes chirp. chirp. chirp."

"That's a bird." Kurama stated.

Zor tilted her head. "What is this bird of which you speak?"

Kris blinked. "I think it's that one green crap that adults are always trying to make me eat." She made a face.

Hiei rolled his eyes. "Idiot."

Kris grabbed Botan's oar from thin air. (How? Who knows...) She hit Hiei upside the head...HARD! "I'm not an idiot!" She blinked. "Wait, what's an idiot?"

"Yes, what is an 'idiot'?" Zor asked confused.

"It's someone who's stupid." Kuwabara said.

Hiei muttered, "You should know," under his breath.

Zor turned towards Kris. "HA! Told you, you were super stupid." Kris kicked her in the shin...again.

Koto slowly stepped forward. "Um, could you please leave? The fight is over."

Kris gave her a very evil glare.

Koto took a step back. "O-on second thought, take your time."

"Yes, we'll go." Kurama said turning to where Zor was...only to find she wasn't there any more.

"Oh, great! We lost a psycho." Yusuke muttered.

Kris suddenly shouted, "MAN OVERBOARD!" She then acted like she was scuba diving.

Yusuke sweatdropped. "Why couldn't it have been her to get lost?"

"Wiggle! Wiggle!"

Everyone turned to the entrance...to see Zor stalking a worm. Everyone sweatdropped...for like the thousandth time.

"Let me take that back." Yusuke said. "Why couldn't we have lost **both** of them?" He paused. "For good."

Kris suddenly fell over twitching.

Kuwabara picked up a stick and poked her. "Is she ok?"

Kris was twitching violently. "LOOK! IMMA FISH!"

Zor's head popped out of nowhere. "Quick! Water her before she sheds!"

"Umm...Could you like drag them away? We have another match." Kota asked/said.

"Yeah. Sure!" Yusuke said. He grabbed the back off Zor's hoodie while Kuwabara grabbed the back of Kris's shirt. They dragged the two girls up to the room, the girls playing rock, paper, scissors all the way. After they go to the room, the other girls joined them.

Kris bounced over to Hiei, who was sitting at the window sil. "Hiiiii mister spiky midget man!"

Hiei's eyes twitched.

Kris poked his hair. "AHH! It's alive!...KEWL!" She continued to poke his hair. "POKE! POKE! POKE!"

Hiei's hand was inching toward his katana and his eyes was twitching like mad.

Zor snuck up behind Kuwabara...and hit him on the head with a frying pan. He fell to the floor so Zor stepped on him.

The girls looked at the two. "Who are they?" A brown-short haired girl asked Yusuke.

Yusuke put his arms behind his head. "Two totally insane people. The one who hit Kuwabara is Zorrann. And the short one poking Hiei's hair is Kris."

Kris stopped poking Hiei's hair to glare at Yusuke. "WHO YOU CALLING SHORT YOU GEL HEADED BITCH!" She had fire in her eyes.

Zor popped out of nowhere and jumped on Kris's head, knocking her to the ground. "Who are you?" she asked the blue haired lady. "And do you have chocolaaaatee?" Zor asked wide eyed.

The blue haired one looked at her strangely (they get a lot of those looks) "Um, I'm Botan! And no I don't have any chocolate, sorry."

"What good are you!" Zor asked angrily. She turned to the brown-haired girl who poke earlier. "What about you?"

"Ummm...No. But I'm Keiko." She said.

Zor screamed. "What good are you PEOPLE?" She looked like she was in a nightmare.

Kris kicked Zor in the head. "SHUT UP! I'm trying to sleep!" She then fell to the floor fast asleep.

They all sweatdropped. "Well, that was random." Kurama stated.

Zor blinked. "Oh." She flopped down dead too.

Kurama spoke slowly. "Who knows what tomorrow will bring with these two." Everyone left for their rooms.

Yusuke suddenly shouted. "HEY! THIS IS MY ROOM!" A frying pan flew and hit him in the head, knocking him out.

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REVIEW! 


	2. Deadly Weapons

Yusuke suddenly shouted, "HEY! THIS IS MY ROOM!" A frying pan flew and hit him the head, knocking him out.

**_ 3 Hours Later_**

There was the sound of evil giggles. Two psychotic people looked down at their masterpieces...Yusuke and Kuwabara!

Yusuke had a splat of paint on his left cheek that was supposed to be a dog. A mustache and rainbow on his right. But most importantly on his forehead were the words...'I LOVE KUWABARA!'

Kuwabara had a pair of thick glasses drawn on and on his forehead...'I LOVE YUSUKE!'

Zor dusted off her heands. "We're geniuses. Geniuses I tell you!"

Kris nodded in agreement. "Now what do we do?"

Kuwabara mumbled something.

Both girls froze. They quietly crept outside.

"Ok, now what?" Kris asked...again.

"Sleep til morning." Both crept back to bed.

**_ The Next Morning_**

"AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" rang through the morning. Yep. That's right. They looked in the mirror.

Zor smirked. "I think they like it."

Kris grinned evily. "Good. Cuz it's permanent."

Kuwabara and Yusuke stormed into the living room like place.

Kris, Zor, and the masked fighter were sitting on the couch eating breakfast.

"KRIS! ZOR!" The 2 boys yelled.

Kris looked at them innocently. "Yessum?"

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU DRAW ON OUR FACES!" Yusuke shouted.

Before anyone could answer, a wet fruit loop hit Yusuke's face and stuck to it.

"Oops." Zor said, sticking her spoon in her mouth.

Kris and Kuwabara fell over laughing.

The masked fight shook their head and sighed.

Yusuke glared at Zor. "Why you little!" He then proceeded to chase her around the room.

Zor screamed, "RUN FROM THE DIMWIT!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?' the 'dimwit' shouted as Keiko entered. Zor hid behind her.

"He be mean! Blease help me!" She said with 'tears'.

Keiko looked angrily at Yusuke. "YOU JERK!"

**SLAP!**

"But wat did I do!" He asked holding his cheek.

"You're picking on a harmless girl!" Keiko shouted.

"Harmless! You mean harmlessly evil!" He shouted back. Zor and Kris were eating cerearl looking back and forth between the two.

Kris stopped eating and spoke up. "Don't you have a fight to lose?"

The masked fighter hit her upside the head.

Kris clutched her head. "OW! What the fuck was that for dammit!"

Zor hit Kris too. Kris glared at her. "What? I was just copying." Zor said. She turned to Yusuke. "Yeah! Don't you have to lose?" The masked fighter smacked her upside the head too.

**_ 20 Minutes Later_**

They had arrived at the arena.

Kris looked around. "Where's the spiky midget and mister lady?" She looked across the arena. "AHH! IT'S DOCTER SKINNER! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"

The doctor raised an eyebrow. "I am Dr Ichigaki, not Dr. Skinner, whoever that is."

"She's the evil lady at our school who wucks out childerns brains and souls." Zor whispered.

"Right." Yusuke said, but the girls weren't listening. (did they ever?) They were busy making sand castles. (how they are making them without sand...i dont kno)

Well Yusuke and Kuwabara and the masked fighter started the fight. It was three on three.

Kris walked over to the Dr. Ichigaki. "Are you related to Santa Clause?"

He blinked. "Why no."

Zor popped up on his other side. "But you look like the evil Christmas elves."

Dr. Ichigaki looked at her. "Where did you come from?"

"Mars." She replied.

Kris waved her hand around. "OH OH OH! I came from hell!'

"Hmm...intriguing..." said Dr. Ichigaki. "You two would make exellent test subjects."

"Is it because we're smart?" Zor asked hopefully.

"No." was the reply.

"Fine! We'll never become rutabaga! Never! I tell you never!" Zor shouted.

Kris tilted her head. "What's a rutabaga?"

"It's an edible root." The Dr. said. "You two are quite amazing. Humans with unusual talents."

"You mean like eat cereal?" Kris asked.

"Or stalk worms?" Zor asked.

He raised an eyebrow. "Sure."

They heard Koto say that the masked fighter was a girl.

Kris looked at her. "Hi Sakura!" She jumped into the ring and bounded over to 'Sakura'. "So, how's Naruto?"

The masked fighter rolled her eyes. "Get off the ring dimwit."

Kris turned to Yusuke. "You heard her bub! Get off the ring!"

A vein on Yusuke's head popped. "She was talking to you!"

"Ohhh. HEY!" Zor pouted and stormed off the arena muttering, "She gets meaner each time we see her! Stupid Sasuke! I blame him!" she stopped muttering when she saw a butterfly passing by. "Ohhh. A butterfly!"

Kris crossed her arms stubbornly and stayed put. "I ain't moving!" Suddenly something fell from the sky, heading right for her. "STOP DROP AND ROLL!" she dove out of the way as a person flew by and hit the wall. "Hey! Watch where you're falling!" She walked over and poked him repeatedly with a fire poker.

Zor, however, was having the time of her life following the butterly. Until, that is, she tripped and fell. She jumped up with a flyswatter and began chasing it shouting, "DIE YOU EVIL MUTANT! DIE!"

Kris continued poking the thing that fell. There was 'BOOM'. She looked around confused and saw Hiei and Kurama falling. "HOLY CHEESE! I didn't know they were flying chipmunks!" She looked down. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" She screamed. She jumped onto the wall still screaming. "KILL IT! KILL IT! KILL IT!"

Everyone looked to see what she was screeching about.

Kris had a look of pure terror on her face as she pointed to the ground.

There, being all creepy and gross, was a big fat cockroach!

Zor stopped her 'friendly patting' fo the now squished butterfly to scream. She started wacking Yusuke with the flyswatter chanting, "KILL IT!" Yusuke pulled the flyswatter away angrily. Zor stared at him for a minute before kicking him and yelling, "Dimwit!"

Kris was sitting onto the wall. "It's gonna eat me! Don't let it eat me! I don't wanna get eaten! MINE!" She grabbed a beer from an unsuspecting demon. She started chugging it down.

Kurama walked over and killed the cockroach. "Better?" But neither girl was listening. (never do) Zor was kicking Yusuke, trying to get the flyswatter back. And Kris was drinking.

Yusuke had given her the flyswatter back and she was currently using to poke the unconscious Kuwabara. Meanwhile Kurama was trying to get the beer from Kris.

Hiei rolled his eyes. "Bakas."

"My ice-cream! No touchy!" Kris screamed, her words slurred. She continued chugging the beer.

The masked fighter has won.

Dr. Ichigaki turned into this giant green troll thingy.

"Nooo not the hic evil broccoli!" Kris jumped off the wall, only to land on her face. "OK! Who put this hic wall here!" She rose and stumbled for the stage. "Move you stupid hic tree!" She kicked the ring.

Everyone watched with sweatdrops.

Zor was poking the doctor with a stick. Her eyes were wide like she was expecting something to happen.

"He's not going to explode you know." Yusuke said.

"Damn!" Zor yelled. She hit Dr. Ichigaki with the flyswatter and stormed off, stepping on Kris on the way. Yusuke sweatdropped.(people seem to do that alot when they're around)

Kris tried to climb onto the ring, but kept falling off. "Stop moving dammit!" She finally made it. She army crawled over to the Dr.

Everyone was quiet, waiting to see what she would do.

Kris staggered to her feet, obviously drunk. A machine gun appeared in her hands. "LOCK AND hic LOAD!"

Zor marched back on stage. "No! You don't use a machine gun!" She pulled out a flamethrower. "FIRE!" The both pulled the triggers...but nothing happened. Zor banged the weapon against her shoe. Nothing. She turned to Kris. "Did you eat the ammo again?"

Kris looked away innocently. "No of course not!"

Hiei had a sweatdrop. "Baka onnas."

Kris turned him, gun raised. "Who you calling stupid!"

Hiei smirked. "Did you forget you have no ammo?"  
"Oh. No." Zor said. "I have some." She pulled out a case of bullets. Everyone stared at her.

"You have bullets why?" Yusuke asked.

"To throw at people. Duh!" Zor rolled her eyes. "Stupid."

Kris grabbed the bullets and fumbled to load the gun. "Stop jumping you hic confounded cheese puffs!" Finally she got the damn thing loaded. "Muwahahahahahaquack!" She started shooting everything.

"YOU IDIOT!" Yusuke was desperately dodging bullets.

Zor was busy drawing a 'masterpiece' of a stick dog. When she held the picture up a random bullet hit it. Zor gasped. She pulled out her flyswatter and started hitting Yusuke.

Yusuke shouted at her, "WHAT THE HELL DID I DO!"

"If you hadn't dodged, my masterpiece wouldn't have been ruined!" Zor shouted.

"Masterpiece! It's a line with an oval! A stop sign is better at drawing than you!" He shouted.

Zor gasped. "DIE YOU LIAR!" She began to beat Yusuke to death with the flyswatter.

Kris was spinning around with her finger on the trigger. "WHEEEE!"

Hiei ran over and grabbed the gun from her. "You idiot!" he hit her in the head.

"OWWY! Shiny!" Kris grabbed Hiei's katana and ran for her fucking life around the arena. "Run run as fast as you can! You can't catch me cause I'm the ginger bread man!"

Zor was busy hurting Yusuke, who was unconscious, when she heard 'ginger bread man'. "Dunk the yummy goodness!" She shouted. She began chasing Hiei who was chasing Kris who was running around like a moron. Dr. Ichigaki was completely forgotten.

Kris was laughing like an idiot. Hiei's katana was unsheathed and held infront of her.

Hiei got fed up with chasing her. He 'teleported' next to her and grabbed back his katana.

"NOOO! Give me back hic Mister Gloriff!" Kris stumbled slightly.

Yusuke was watching in amusment. "Note to self: Don't give Kris beer, a gun, or a sword." He looked looked at Zor who paused from running to give Kuwabara a few more swats. "Or Zor a flyswatter. But I think we forgot something." He went into a thinking pose.

The masked fighter slapped him upside the head and pointed toward the Dr. The Dr., like everyone else, was watching Zor and Kris with a sweatdrop.

Kris was 'crying'. "You big hic meanie cheese cake!"

Dr. Ichigaki was baffled by all this.

Yusuke took this oppurtunity to kick the Dr.'s ass.

Kris latched onto Hie's arm. "I want ice-cream!"

Zor popped up, again, behind Hiei and shouted, "I WANT ICE-CREAM!"

When Hiei turned around to kill her she was gone. He looked around to see where she had gone so fast. Hiei heard a muffled sound and looked down...and sweatdropped.

Zor had tripped standing still and landed face first in the dirt.

Kris was still latched onto Hiei's arm. "SANTA! I want a hic puppy!"

Yusuke smirked. "Looks like someone likes you three eyes."

Kris looked up at Hiei with wide eyes. "You have three eyes!"

Zor was currently on the ground crawling, like a dog sneaking up on a bone, toward her flyswatter which Yusuke had taken from her. Yusuke swa her and kicked the object away. She went crawling after it.

Hiei looked away from the girl. "Hn."

Kris pouted. "ZOR! HIEI'S BEING MEAN!"

Yusuke snickered. Kuwabara would have too but he couldn't move.

Zor pounced on the flyswatter. She ran and stood in front of Hiei staring at him. The she yelled, "CHICKEN!" and started hitting.

Kris did'nt let go of Hiei's arm, but she did dodge the flyswatter.

Yusuke was dying with laughter.

Every demon in the audience was staring wide eyed.

Kurama looked sympathetically at Hiei.

It was announced Team Urameshi would be fighting again. Yusuke screamed in outrage and even Zor stopped 'gently tapping' Hiei's head with the flyswatter to look up.


	3. The voices and Bacon!

Kris looked around with wide eyes. "They're back! NOOO!"

Yusuke raised an eyebrow. "Who's back?"

"The voices!" Kris clutched her head, temporarily forgetting Hiei.

"That would be the anouncer." Kurama stated.

Zor was busy staring at 5 cloaked figures. "The bananas have laid an egg and danced to a pickle."

Everyone looked at her strangely...again.

"AH! Not those evil bananas! RUN AWAY!" Kris ran around in squares. "AH AH!"

Zor joined her and they ran around in squares, that is, until they ran into a wall. Both fell over with their sneakers in the air. Everyone sweatdropped.

Kris jumped up and glared at the wall. "A wise guy eh? Well take this!" Her eyes narrowed. "Hey now! Don't go dissing my sock! It can cook a duck way better than you!" She kicked the wall and turned away from it, arms crossed. "That's it! We are so over!"

Zor was still lying on the ground with her feet in the air. Yusuke poked her in the head with a stick. "Is she alive?"

Kris looked at Zor. "Nooo! The evil bananas strike again!" She ran over and started covering Zor with dirt like a dog. Surprisingly a grey dog tail and 2 grey dog ears appeared. "Hey! Imma dog! BAAAAHHH!"

Zor rose up from the dead like a zombie. "I'm aliiiiiive. Aliiiiiive I tell you."

Yusuke rubbed his temples. "You were never dead moron."

Kris bounded over to Zor, her newly aquirred tail wagging like mad. "Look! Imma dog Zor! Look Look! Imma doggy! BAAAAAHH!"

"Baaahh? You look like a sheep. But I'm a goat...BURP!" Zor put her hands on her hips looking proud. A minuted passed. Nobody replied. Zor looked around but nobody was there. She looked at the arena. Kurama was fighting a guy with paint...or makeup. Zor got tears in her eyes. "That's okay...I'm fine...sniff no I'm not."

Kris pointed at Zor. "Haha-" Something caught her eyes. "Duuude." She bounded over to Hiei and the masked fighter. "What are you doing in a tent? Are you circus people!"

Zor let out a dragon screech and pounced upon a rock! She wagged her tail...wait, tail? Yup, tail. A thick dragon tail and dragon ears that were both black.

"How do they have ears and tails?" Yusuke asked as Zor pawed at the rock like a cat.

Kurama was fighting.

Kris was poking the force field around the tent. It shocked her each time. "ZZZZ haha POKE! ZZZZZ haha POKE! ZZZZ." She continued this.

Zor continued to paw at the rock with her rear in, in the air wagging her tail. "meow. meow. meow. meow."

Yusuke sweatdropped. "I thought you were a dragon."

Zor looked over he shoulder and tilted her head. "Meeeeooow?"

Kris was still poking the force field when a girl walked up beside her.

"You foolish girl. What do you think you're doing?" she asked.

Kris looked at her. "Who are you?"

"I am the enchantress Ruka." she replied.

Kris blinked. "Enchantress?"

Yusuke glared at Kris. "Stop fraternizing with the enemy!" Little did he see Zor stalking him like a cat. That is, till she pounced. Yusuke narrowed his eyes. "Why are you biting my head!" Yep, Zor was on Yusuke's back biting his head.

"Nice Zor," Kris stated. "Ruka let Hiei and the mummy dude go or I will seriously hurt you!"

Ruka stuck up her nose. (i'd like to shove a pencil up her nose...) "What could you possibly do?"

Kris glared. "You asked for it!" She pulled out a bazooka. "LOCK AND LOAD...AGAIN!"

Kris was interrupted by Yusuke shouting, "WILL YOU STOP CHEWING MY HEAD!" Zor was currently trying to crack Yusuke's head open with her teeth.

Kurama had just beaten paint...er makeup boy.

Kris looked at Yusuke. "SIT ZOR!"

Zor sat on the ground like a dog and stuck out her tongue. Yusuke blinked. "What, that's it!"

"Yup!" Kris then fired at Ruka.

"AH!" Ruka dodged.

Kris glared. "Last chance to release them!"

Zor was still sitting there wagging her tail. Yusuke poked her with a stick. Zor turned and bared her teeth. "GROWL!" Yusuke jumped back.

Ruka didn't back down.

"Alright! You asked for it!" Kris got ready to fire again. She suddenly dropped the bazooka. "COLD!" She shivered madly.

Kurama was fighting Touya, the Ice Master.

Kris started jumping around. "Gah! So cold! I HATE THE COLD!" She curled up on the ground, shivering like a madman.

Zor hopped over to Kris and began tapping her on the head with her tail. Then she turned around and began kicking dirt on Kris like a dog covering up something unpleasant.

Yusuke blinked. "Ooookay."

"GAH!" Kris jumped up and kicked Zor in the head. She shook the dirt off of her. "Dammit I'm not dead!" She then added as an after thought, "Though I wish I was."

Botan sloowly walked over. "You wish you were dead?"

_Great, not only do we have two psychos on our hands, one of them's suicidal!_ Yusuke thought.

Kris nodded. "That way I could be a ghost and terrorize people more than ever!" She grinned.

Yusuke pulled an anime fall. _Nevermind._

Walking up behind Kuwabara, Zor began to strangle him with her tail. Luckily for Kuwabara, Yusuke saw. "STOP TRYING TO KILL HIM!"

Blink. Zor objected, "I'm not killing him. I'm slowly choking the life out of him."

Kris snickered.

Kurama beat Touya and was now unconscious. Yusuke tried to fight next but they wouldn't let him. Bakken stepped up. He started beating the shit outta Kurama.

For some odd reason this ticked off Kris. She hopped onto the ring. "DROP HIM!"

Bakken looked at her. "Or what?"

Kris growled, her dog ears flat and her teeth bared.

"Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells! Something something something!" Zor sang as she hit Kuwabara with her tail.

Koto stepped infront of Kris. "Please get off the ring."

Kris glared at Koto. "No!"

Koto blinked. "Yes!"

"No!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

Bakken went back to beating Kurama when some dude in a cloak (the last dude left cloaked) told him to stop and he did. (gooood doggy)

Kris was still arguing with Koto.

A shoe flew and hit Bakken in the head. "You're not listening to my song!" Zor said storming up to him and kicking him in the shin.

"Please get off the ring!" Koto was growing impatient. "And would the next fighters step up!"

Yusuke walked on and tried to drag the two girls off.

"NO NO NO!" Kris bit down on Yusuke's hand.

"OWWW! LET GO DAMMIT! LET GO!" Yusuke tried shaking her off. She kept a death grip on his hand.

Crawling on Yusuke's shoulders like a three year old, Zor swung herself so her upside down eyes looked into Yusuke's. She said seriously, "Steam steam steam. Squishy squishy squish. Eat me! Eat me!"

Yusuke blinked. "Should I even ask?"

Kris tilted her head. "Warf!"

Everyone looked at her.

"What?" Yusuke asked.

Kris crossed her eyes. "Bleep Meep Noke Blamer Blarg!"

Zor rapped Yusuke on the head and whispered, "I'm afraid of the water."

Yusuke scowled. "Why?"

Zor's eyes widened. She whispered still, "The man-eating mermaids."

Kris's eyes widened and she screamed in a high pitched voice, "SCREEEEEEE CLAAAHHHHH FEEEEEEEEEP!"

Zor began screaming too. Yusuke, getting annoyed, slapped Kris upside the head to shut her up. (why are they always slapping Kris!) He looked at Zor who was still on his back. "What?"

"I saw a mermaid eat a man," Zor said.

"Where?" Yusuke asked seriously. (Yusuke? Serious? ITS THE END OF THE WORLD!)

She replied slowly, "In...a...movie."

Kris suddenly fell to the ground acting like she was having a seizure.

"You're afraid of a fucking movie character! AND GET OFF ME DAMMIT!" Yusuke screamed.

"But she had pointy teeth and then she got out of her tank and then she ate a man and then she turned human and then she turned into an evil fish thi-"

Yusuke put his hand over her mouth, muffling her rambling. "Sorry I asked."

Kris was still on the ground 'having a seizure'. She started foaming at the mouth.

Botan blinked. "Does she have rabies?" (most likely...)

Kris jumped to all fours and started chasing Koto like a rabid dog.

"AHHH!" Koto screamed.

Zor was resting her elbows on Yusuke's head with her head in her hands watching the scene.

Yusuke growled. "WILL YOU GET OFF ME?"

She slowly looked down at him. "No."

Kris was still acting like a rapid dog. Foaming at the mouth. Growling. Shaking her head about sending foam flying.

"AHHHH GET HER AWAY FROM ME!" Koto yelled, dodging Kris who had lunged at her.

Kris went flying off the ring and slammed into the force field around the tent. "ZZZZZZZZ!"

Zor blinked. "Wow. A roasted idiot."

Yusuke sneered. "Go join her. She's your friend."

"Yes...but I'm not like you. I'm not not not unsmart."

Yusuke smiled in victory, that is of course until he realised she had called him stupid. "Why you littl-"

He was interrupted by Bakken. "Can we finish our fight now?"

"Ahem. Yes. Please begin." Koto dragged Zor off the ring.

Kris blinked and sat up. "Whoa! Lets do that again!" She ran into the force field. "ZZZZZ!" She continued.

Zor glared up at Koto. "I curse you to be a french fry."

"Um...is that good?"

Zor blinked. "Huh? Did you say something?"

Koto's ears drooped. "You just cursed me."

"I did? Cool!" Zor said happily.

Kris continued running into the force field. "ZZZZ!"

Yusuke was fighting Bakken.

Bakkens' mist shrouded the stadium.

Kris held her nose. "Nasty! It's called deoderent dude! USE IT MISTER STINKY BUTT!"

Zor looked Koto in the eyes. She then burst into tears. "No! Not Alex!"

Koto looked puzzled. "Who's Alex?"

Zor stopped crying. "I don't know." She walked over to Kris and hit her on the head with a broom. (wher she got no one knows) "Hey. Who's Alex?"

Kris blinked. "Not a clue." She jumped up on the wall and asked a random demon, "Who's Alex?"

Yusuke had just beaten Bakken.

Jin had just walked to the arena. Zor walked up to Jin solemnly.

"What be the matter lassie?" He asked.

Zor...pulled his ears.

Kris pointed and laughed.

Yusuke stalked toward Zor. "Stop harassing him!"

Zor looked at him with wide eyes. "Harass? What does that mean?"

"Does it have something to do with horses!" Kris asked excitedly.

Kurama sweatdropped. "No, it doesn't."

"Damn." Kris pouted slightly.

"Moron. That would be jackass." Zor said rolling her eyes.

Kurama corrected, "That would be a donkey."

"You LIE!" She accused.

"What are we talking about?" Kris looked confused.

"Stop talking. It makes you seem stupider than you really are." Yusuke was fighting Jin.

"Hey! I resent that! I am not stupid!" Kris paused and added as an after thought, "All the time anyway."

"Baka. You just insulted yourself." Hiei said.

"DID NOT!...o wait...I did...dammit!" Kris crossed her arms.

Zor looked up into the sky where Jin was. "He can fly?" She said amazed. Then her eyes widened. "IT'S A FLYING PIECE OF BACON!...yummmm bacon."

"Mmmmmm bacon!" Kris drooled. "I'm hungry!" She then proceeded to try and eat Botan's sleeve. "Mmmm chicken!"

"I am not a chicken!" Botan pulled her arm away from the hungry girl.

Zor crawled over to Botan. "So you're bacon?"

"No! I'm not bacon OR chicken!" She huffed.

Zor nodded. "Oh I see. Then you're ham."

"I'M NOT FOOD!" Botan screeched.

Everyone looked at the 3 girls.

"We didn't say you were food!" Kris explained. "We said you were ham!"

"Ham is food you moron!" Botan screeched.

Kris tilted her head. "It is?"

Zor shook her head. "Stop lieing. Ham isn't food. Ham is ham."

Botan sweatdropped. "If you say so."

"I did say so." Zor said.

"This is all very boring and all. And I'm still hungry!" Kris whined.

"No one cares baka."

Kris glared at Hiei. "Stop speaking in Japanese! I barely understand English! How do you expect me to understand Japanese if I don't even know English!"

Botan sweatdropped. "Then how come you're talking?"

"Because she's a psycho deer drom the Planet Poop who worship the toads." Zor said seriously.

Botan's sweatdrop grew. "Planet Poop?"

Kris was still yelling at Hiei who was promtly ignoring her. "Listen to me when I'm talking! Hey look! A birdy!" She pointed to Jin.

Zor pulled out a shot gun. "Not for long!" She began firing it at Jin with him barely dodging.

"Hey! Will ye' cut that out!" Jin said. His eyes widened when he was a bullet coming for his head. He ducked just in time as a single lock of hair floated down.

"AHHH the polar bear is shedding! Kill it kill it!" Kris pulled out a machine gun and started firing.

"STOP IT! THIS IS MY FIGHT!" Yusuke screamed at them.

Zor glanced at him. "He said it's his fight." Both turned their weapons toward him. "DIE SLIMEBALL!" The began firing.

"What the hell!" Yusuke shouted dodging for cover.

"MUWAHAHAHAHAHAquack!" Kris was firing the machine gun in all directions.

Hiei and the masked fighter were watching all of this with sweatdrops.

Zor started jumping up and down on Kuwabara. "Look Kris! A trampoline!"

Yusuke peeked his head over the arena. "Psychos."

"Whee!" Kris joined Zor in jumping.

Kuwabara looked like he was dying.

Yusuke shrugged and went back to fighting Jin.

Kuwabara crawled slowly over to Ruka with both girls still on his back. "Help.Please." He begged.

Kris poked his head. "Yup he's still a liver." She got up, kicked him in the ribs, and wandered off.

Kuwabara looked like he was in extreme pain. "Help."

Botan rushed over and pulled Zor off. "Leave him alone. Can't you see he's in pain!"

Kris was currently walking around the arena singing, "Follow the yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road."

Zor blinked. "That's the point." She then flew off and tackled Yusuke to the ground. Then she hit him on the head with a school bag.

"OW! That HURTS! What do you have in there!" Yusuke shouted.

Zor looked down at him. "Rocks."

"WHY do you have rocks in there?"  
"To protect them from the tape." Came the reply.

Kris looked at Zor then the school bag. "NOOOOO!" She fell to the ground dramatically. "It haunts me! Why? WHY!"

"What are you blabbing about now baka?" Hiei asked, annoyance in his voice.

Kris blinked at him. "...I...I don't know."

Zor starred at Kris. Then she wacked her with the bag while trying to hear something. "Nope. Nada."

Yusuke, with a popping vein, asked, "Nope what?"

"Nope as in nothing growing."

Yusuke's eyes narrowed. "Whatever."

Kris blinked. "I'm lost." Pause. "AH! I'M LOST! WHERE DID I GO? AHHHHHHH!"

Hiei rolled his eyes. "Baka."

"Attack of the Boogers." Zor said, staring off into nowhere.

"What!" Yusuke, Jin, and Kuwabara asked.

Zor looked at them. "What? You guys must be hearing things. Psyhos."


End file.
